Monday, May 28, 2012

Sister Wives

I was just going through my list of posts and found this one from around the first of the year.  I'm not sure why I didn't post it.  Maybe I was afraid I shouldn't post it because of the controversial subject.  Maybe I wanted different graphics.  I honestly don't remember.  Whatever the reason, I figured this might be a good post to see if anybody is really reading my blog.  LOL  Keep in mind that I don't know any of them personally so all my judgements are based on what I've seen on the show.  Here is my take on Sister Wives and Kody taking a new "wife" after 16 years. 


Confession time. I watch Sister Wives on TLC.  If you aren't familiar with this controversial reality series, it's about Kody Brown, his wives Meri, Janelle, and Christine, and their thirteen children among them. In the first season the show also televised Brown's courting and eventual marriage to a fourth wife, Robyn who herself has three children.  Robyn was the first new wife to enter the family in 16 years. The only legal marriage is between Kody and his first wife, Meri, while the others' marriages are considered spiritual unions. As of the September 2010 debut, Kody has been married to Meri for 21 years, Janelle for 18 years, and Christine, who is the homemaker, for 17 years.

Disclaimer: I don't agree with their lifestyle but I enjoy seeing how they manage to make it work (at least in front of the cameras).  I don't think that Kody should be prosecuted for having 4 wives.  He is legally married only to Meri, and the other marriages are what they call spiritual unions.  I see it as a husband who cheats with multiple women with his wife's permission. As wrong as that is, it's not illegal. If cheating with multiple women with your wives permission is illegal, then cheating with multiple women without your wife knowing should be illegal.  So when are they going to arrest my ex-husband? End of Disclaimer.  :-)  

When Kody took Robyn as his 4th wife after so many years had past since "marrying" the first 3, I predicted trouble on the home front. There's not that much age difference in the wives.  Robyn is 31, Meri 39, Janelle 40, and Christine 37.  Robyn looks much younger to me, making it look like a classic case of trading in the old, used up ones for a younger model. She still has a slim, trim body but when she appeared on the scene she only had  three children from her monogamous first marriage.  I'd like to see what she would look like after having as many children as Christine and Janelle.  (She and Kody recently had a son).  Janelle and Christine have each given Kody six children.   Sadly, Meri and Kody have only a daughter due to her infertility problems.

Christine is my favorite with Meri coming in a close second.  I think the reason I like Christine so much is she has the heart of a homemaker, caring for her home and family.  Like me, I think she sees that as more important than having a career.  She's the one who loves creating a loving home for all the children.  Christine's the one who's home with all the children nurturing them all as if they were her own, while Kody and the other wives work.  How she manages grocery shopping and maintaining the huge pantry they have is beyond me!  I admire how she makes it look easy.

It breaks my heart to see how Christine is hurting because of trouble in her and Kody's marriage.  I see Kody bringing Robin in to the family as a slap in the face to Meri, Janelle and Christine.  I know that this situation is not something logical at all but I have to wonder what kind of logic Kody was using when he started courting another wife when things weren't good with one of the ones he already had.  Yep, let's bring in younger, thinner wife.  That should solve the problem of Christine already feeling left out.

Let's spend hours driving to where Robyn lives and stay several days and cheat the three wives at home out of their time with him.  Let's do everything about the courtship completely different than the first three and let them know that Robyn got things from Kody that the other three wanted but didn't get.  Let's make the wedding a bigger deal than any of the other three and expect the wives to help her pick out her dress.  (And then let it slip that he's already picked out Robyn's dress.)  To finish it all up let's take the new younger, thinner wife on an expensive honeymoon to Mexico when the other three didn't even get a trip to the next town over. 

Is there any wonder that Christine is jealous of Robyn?  Janelle seems to be jealous as well but not as much as Christine.  I see Janelle is a strong woman who just needed Kody around so she could have children.   Meri seems to be the only one happy with Robyn joining the family but I have to wonder if things went the way she thought they would.  I think it's a huge possibility that Meri is as close to Robyn as she seems to be because Meri feels guilty for suggesting to Kody that he consider courting Robyn.  I look forward to next season and seeing how it all works out.

I have to admit that I gained a whole new respect for Robin after finally watching the episode where she gave birth to a 10 lb baby with a 15 inch head - at home with no pain killers.  Then she offered to be a surrogate for Meri and Cody since Meri can't conceive immediately after having that 10 lb baby boy.  Even if it "was for the cameras" which were rolling, there wouldn't be enough money in the world for those words to come out of my mouth. I'd be too afraid that Meri might think I was serious. Or since most people think the wives are crazy for living that lifestyle, the men in the white coats would come take me away.  

I don't understand women who are able to be surrogates.  I think that it is so awesome that there are people who are willing to help couples have biological children when they have no other way to accomplish that.  What a gift to give to someone.  I could never do it even for strangers where I would never see the child again.  To give my child to someone whom I would see raising my child every day would push me into a world where I couldn't function.  It will be interesting to see what Meri's answer is.  I suspect that Meri will turn Robyn down.  As much as I know that Meri would love to have another child, I think she has the good sense to know that they can't handle another child in the family. Even the older kids realized that when they announce that Solomon was on his way. At some point, you have to stop having children. (Don't get me started on the Duggars and the Quiverfull movement.)

So, what do you think?

Recap of my 2012 Life Changes

I can't believe that I've not posted since January 14!  So much for part of the life changes I had planned. Here's a recap of the life changes I planned for 2012 and how they have progressed or not progressed.
    1. My first life change is to faithfully read my Bible every day; even if it’s just one verse.  I'm happy to report that I am making progress with this one.  My Bible reading is still not where I want it to be but I'm getting there. 

    1. Life change two is to become more submissive to my husband and his Biblical role as head of the household.  I have accomplished this goal and it has made a huge difference in our life.  It’s made so much of a difference that I don’t have the space or time to tell you how much it’s meant to both of us.

    1. Life change three is to put together a healthy plan of eating and stick to it.  I've always heard that it takes 28 days to develop a habit.  Every time we've gotten close to the sticking to it part, something has happened to get us off our plan.  We are both determined to do this one and we're starting over again Tuesday morning.  It was going to be Monday morning but we got invited to a Memorial Day cook out.  We've been "bad" for several weeks now so I don't see how one more day can make it any worse.
    1.  Life change four is to develop a workable budget and stick to it.  This is one of the most important goals and I feel like it’s a colossal failure. There's no reason for it to be so difficult.  We've been through Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University.  We've been to 3 live events and we have his books and we've read them.  We know the program works because we have family and friends that are living proof.  June 1 when Bill gets paid next we are starting over from the beginning.  It's very important that this does get addressed as you will see in the next few posts.

    1. Life change five is to work towards a successful way to supplement our income.  See #4.  :-)  I'm letting myself slide a little on this one because I have been doing research and looking for a niche that doesn't have 100's of people who do it better, have been doing it longer, etc.  I've got something in mind to try but I still need to find something to do while I get my skills to accomplish my idea up to speed.
    1. Life change six is to blog every day.  Guess I don't even have to tell you that I've not done this one.  I should have made myself do this one even when I was spending most of my time lying down.  After all, I do have a Wi-Fi laptop so there was no excuse.  What I want to do from this point on is to post something.  A few lines, a picture, a graphic.  Something that will let you know that I value your time and appreciate you dropping by to visit.

    1. Life change seven is to plan a weekly “date night” for my wonderful husband and me.  This is one that I can say has been accomplished with great results.  Even when I was sick and/or in a flare, we managed to do something fun together even if we didn't leave home.  It's made a great difference in our lives and has been a huge help in accomplishing #2.

    Out of seven changes, I've accomplished two and have made progress on one.  Dave Ramsey says that a goal without a plan is just a dream.  I want to reach my goal so planning is in my future.

    The Next Time You See A Member of the Armed Forces, Say Thank You!

    Army Strong
    Aim High

    A Global Force For Good
    The Few, The Proud, The Marines
    Born Ready

    Thank you to all who have served our country and to those serving it now.  It is a tremendous responsibility that you choose to take on knowing that the choice you made could cost you your life. A special thank you goes out to the families of those men and women serving our country.  I was a Navy wife for almost 25 years so I know the sacrifice that the families make first hand. 

    Children are born without dad there, children who may be almost a year old before dad holds them the first time.  Children grow from infants to toddlers, from toddlers to youngsters, from youngsters to teenagers while mom or dad are not there.  Many will graduate from high school while mom or dad are deployed.

    Those who serve our country miss out on their children being born, their first steps, their first words, their first day of school.  They miss birthdays, anniversaries, and Valentine's Day.  All of these are things we take for granted and even some get angry that their other half forgets these special days.  Instead of being angry, be glad that they are there with you even if they did forget. They could be on some distant shore protecting all that is good in this world and giving us the freedom to do as we please.

    Don't forget the members of the Reserves and National Guard.  Many of them have been called up for Active Duty leaving their families and their jobs behind.  They know this is a possibility when they join but just like their active counterparts, they are willing to lay their life on the line for their country.

    Whenever you see a member of our Armed Forces, whether they are active duty, reservist or veterans, please thank them for their service to our country.

     Please join me in a prayer for Memorial Day.

    Dear Heavenly Father, As we remember those who have made the ultimate sacrifice for our freedom, we think of how they have followed in the footsteps of your son, our Savior, Jesus Christ.  Please hold our service men and women in your strong arms.  Cover them with your sheltering grace and presence as they stand in the gap for our protection.  We also remember the families of our troops, and ask for your unique blessings to fill their homes with your peace, provision and strength to fill their lives.  May the members of our Armed Forces be filled with courage each day  and may they trust in the Lord's mighty power to accomplish each task.  Let our military brothers and sisters feel our love and support.  In the name of Jesus, Amen.